Uh oh... hope you have a second floor to effectively trap yourself in...
Let’s count together.
I’m a twenty-something wayward unemployed film school graduate just looking for some purpose in life (1). Last week, I got a call from my temp agency to cover at Lincoln Center. The mere mention of Lincoln Center sends me reeling into intense longing for my high school life as a theatre geek – a time where I knew what I wanted and had everything I needed (2). On my way to my first day at work, I find myself in a daydream like state wondering what it’d be like to once again be surrounded by theatre (3). Suddenly remembering how impractical daydreaming is during a Manhattan morning commute, I leave my subconscious to find that my Metrocard won’t swipe (when I was last employed, we didn’t have to worry about Metrocards with just 20 cents leftover on them chilling in our purses) and a mob of angry New Yorkers has collected behind me (4). I rush through the turnstiles, embarrassed and with the sudden realization that, oh gosh, I’m going to be late! I run to the platform to find that the first five cars are packed but see an empty space just about my size in the sixth car and I slip in just as the doors close (5). I sigh audibly, demonstrating clearly to those around me how relieved I am (6). But then, what’s this (7)? A familiar face. I look away, wondering… could it be? Is that who I think it is? Is it the face of the hellish side of high school I had forgotten until just now right here in front of me in the only available spot on the train after five years of living lives away from each other? Yep, it’s her. She stares a hole into my face as I become a bumbling idiot in my attempt to push through the packed car to avoid the possibility of conversation (8). I arrive at the office, flustered but intact, only to find myself surrounded by bomb-sniffing dogs and snipers – what the hell (9)? A passerby informs me that the President of the United States (oh, hey Obama) just happens to be in the same building this morning (10).
Okay… so what’s the count? 10 movie clichés – 8 of which I experienced before 9am. I guarantee you I will have at least 10 more before the end of the day. I would’ve included running into a woman on the subway and having a small exchange with her before I officially met her later on at the office as my supervisor (gasp! Quelle coïncidence) but that’s usually only a cliché if the exchange was embarrassing or romantic in nature. It was neither.
I’m often accused of making mundane moments more significant than they actually are but I also think that our practical sides have the tendency to downplay many poignant moments in our lives (crap, I think this is also a movie cliché) causing us to view our existences as boring or typical in comparison to those of the bigscreen. This may be why we have mixed reactions when we come upon a cliché. There’s the initial disgust that this made it to whatever public form we’re viewing it in and then there’s that secondary disgust for that time this cliché happened to us. Every cliché you’ve ever seen, heard or read are things that you or someone within a one hundred foot radius of you has experienced on some level (hrm… perhaps that was hyperbolic. I do not, nor do I know of anyone who thinks the best reaction to a chainsaw-wielding psycho at your door is to run upstairs, of all places). But seriously… why is it that the cheesiest song lyrics suddenly make so much sense when we’re heartbroken or in love? Why is it that the climactic moment in a film causes us to choke up regardless of how poorly written it was?
Saying clichés are clichés for a reason has become such a cliché in and of itself that I often hesitate to say it. The folks at The A.V. Club have compiled a list of clichés that I think are worthy of a readin’. While you’re at it, check out the male cast members of He’s Just Not That Into You in a YouTube promo for the film touching on the clichés of “chick flicks.” These are some of the best clichés you love to hate but can never recall when someone asks you which clichés you hate the most (if you’re anything like me, you face this debacle often). Sometimes it takes a third party to point them out before you realize how annoying they are (healthy, right?).
While you’re checking those out, I’m going to have a realization that I left theatre for a reason and go on to appreciate how much I’ve grown since high school (11). Then I’m going to walk into the sun setting on the Manhattan skyline, temporarily content with my directionless life (12).
Edit: If you weren’t tagged in my Facebook note and found this page on your own, I’d like to extend to you what I’ve been asking my friends to help me out on.
Do tell:
1) What movie clichés or stock characters do you hate the most?
2) What movie clichés seem to haunt your actual life?
