Awesome: visualizations of famous movie quotes, via kottke.

What is the worst sentence you ever wrote?

The David Foster Wallace audio project.

Speaking of whom, you’ve probably already heard that UT-Austin recently acquired Wallace’s archive. But it’s worth a mention here regardless, if only because of these doodles David Foster Wallace drew on Cormac McCarthy’s face: Read more »

Vonnegut-inspired needlepoint.

Speaking of, here is an interesting interview with Kurt Vonnegut, which The Paris Review composited from four interviews done with the author over the past decade, so it’s more like an interview “conducted with himself, by himself.” Via The Rumpus.

Here is a question I would like an answer to: why is there no Jewish Narnia?

I hope you enjoyed all those great writing tips from The Guardian over the past few weeks. Now the parodies (sort of) have arrived:

From Probably just a story, via HTMLGIANT:

3. If your plot is too exciting or moving too fast, enhance realism by making your characters stop for a meal at an ethnic restaurant. Describe each course and allow your characters to re-cap the plot so far.

13. Write what you know, especially you white people out there.

From The Measure:

1. All of humanity’s power and complexity can be found in season two of Star Trek: Next Generation.

3. Write in your underpants.

From The Globe and Mail, via Bookninja:

1. Never snack while writing; consume only complete meals – a starch, two vegetables and one serving lean protein (remember that one serving is about the size of a pack of playing cards.)

2. Marry somebody who will cook this.

9. If an irate reader should break into your home, tie you to a chair and terrorize you with selections from the cutlery drawer, think back to your most recent novel. Was its point of view inconsistent? Did you at any time make use of the second person, or urban slang, even ironically? Did you attempt to underscore the significance of an action by describing it as having been performed “to the max”? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, accept what you have coming.

Aaaaand because I love you, here is a video of a reinterpretation of Hamlet, which demonstrates how the play would have ended much differently if Ophelia had a sassy gay friend: Read more »

For its newest book, Simon & Schuster has acquired the true life story of a…cat.

A breakdown of common problems found in debut novels.

Some tips on overcoming creative block, via kottke.

Edward who? Werewolves are so hot right now.

“Famous Quotes from Shakespeare Altered to Describe My Everyday Life.” Some choice quotes:

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose leaves a nasty stain on corduroy. A good bleach. O happy dagger!

That her veggie and her hot dog are touching the young lady doth protest too much.

Liking right now: Rejection Digest, a sort of happy afterlife for otherwise rejected stories.

Also liking right now: FictionDaily, which links to new works of fiction every day in three different categories (long/short/genre). Via The Millions.

Aaaand because it’s Wednesday and you need a pick-me-up, here is George Orwell’s 1984 as a Brazilian puppet show: Read more »

The 2009 Oddest Book Title prize has drawn a record number of submissions, including the gem at left.

Fuck Yeah NYRB Classics!! Via The Millions.

American Psycho…the musical!

One poem, translated 31 ways. Via Silliman’s Blog.

What would your favorite TV characters read?

Choose your own literary elite nickname. Mine is ‘Helpless Drunken Cobra.’

Is Shoplifting from American Apparel the new Catcher in the Rye?

Our pals at Awkward Press (publishers of the very enjoyable Awkward One) are currently accepting submissions for their upcoming issue Awkward Two. Details here.

Aaaaand because we love you: Read more »

Yum.

I would totally read a novel based on Craigslist Missed Connections.

I would also totally enjoy book reports made out of cake. (See left.)

Teenagers on Salinger.

Interlinked short stories via geocaches.

For you book design lovers: 45 beautifully designed book covers and classic titles turned into cigarette packs.

Finnegan’s Wank.

McSweeney’s reimagines The Baby-sitter’s Club for the new decade.

How to be a literary manboy of New York City.

Aaand to get you through the rest of your week: the ultimate graphic novel, in six panels: Read more »

Ernest Hemingway's 1918 passport photo

Passport photos of famous artists, via The Rumpus.

Was Shakespeare actually a woman?

Over at The Millions, a book pirate bares all.

Literary cartography, via Silliman’s Blog.

The top 20 most annoying book reviewer cliches, and how to use them all in one meaningless review, via Eimear Ryan.

Is there such a thing as a “typical” New Yorker short story?

Dictionaries have been banned from southern California schools after a parent’s complaint over a “sexually graphic” definition.

Is it possible to accurately rank writing programs?

And to get you through the hump day, here is a video of Ninja Turtles stealing pizzas: Read more »

Uh. Is that what I think it is?

Where famous writers delivered their first (and last) words.

The Caustic Cover Critic on Tutis, a publisher that takes public domain works and puts “ridiculously inappropriate covers on them” (see left), via The Second Pass.

The five stages of grief publishing.

Seven books that changed the world, if only they actually existed.

“I can’t control the kittens. Too many whiskers! Too many whiskers!” This and more from a husband who talks in his sleep, broadcast to the world by his adoring wife. Via The Millions.

The WSJ discusses the death of the slush pile, and M. A. Orthofer of The Literary Saloon responds.

Oh, this is sad. An anonymous visitor who is known to leave roses and cognac on Edgar Allen Poe’s grave for the writer’s birthday has broken tradition for the first time in over sixty years.

Lit 101 class in 3 lines or less, via HTMLGIANT.

Aaaand just for kicks, the Spampersand: Read more »

7 contemporary writers answer the question: is Leo Tolstoy the greatest writer of all time?

The Millions breaks down fiction released by The New Yorker in 2009.

Poeteevee is a new online poetry video series, via HTMLGIANT.

Selections from the Twitter stream of personal ads from the London Review of Books.

Well, it’s official: watching TV will make you die.

James Frey’s six-word memoir: “So would you believe me anyway?” Heh. Via The Book Bench.

The pickup artist poem, via Ron Silliman.

How many have you slept with? Uh, books, I mean.

Aaaand because it’s Wedneday, a video called “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Murder,” in which a hitchhiker (true to statistics, a murderer) meets his driver (also true to statistics, a murderer). Excellent. Read more »

Pocohontar

Which words would you banish?

Ben Okri is writing a poem celebrating 2010 on Twitter, to last all of January.

Avahontas. Pocohontar.

Enough with the Jane Austen mashups already.

Books have been banned from all flights by airline Transport Canada in the wake of the foiled Christmas Day attack.

100 years of literary noughtiness.

Book blurb of the week: “…the most pestilential book ever vomited, I think, from the jaws of hell.”

Once again, there is hope yet for the written word.

And to help get you through the first full week of 2010: Student brings a typewriter to class, professor asks him, “Can you mute the sound?” Read more »

Are computer-generated animations the actors of the future?

Despairing video game poetry.

How much cash is a short story worth?

The sexiest poem of 2009.

Will films like Avatar usher in an actorless era?

Speaking of, Boing Boing proposes some storytelling risks that Avatar could have taken.

The New York Times offers some tips on cleaning out your library.

Where does your favorite author place on this tourist map of literature?

And because it’s the holidays and I’m feeling oddly sentimental, here are 156 countries singing The Beatles’ “All You Need Is Love.” Read more »